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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23388721">Whole Lotta</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/iminterstellar/pseuds/iminterstellar'>iminterstellar</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>changki song inspired one shots [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Monsta X (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ambiguous/Open Ending, Light Angst, M/M, Open to Interpretation</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 05:01:10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>678</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23388721</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/iminterstellar/pseuds/iminterstellar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>sometimes it's good to say goodbye, as long as we make it out alive then it'll be alright; don't you think a piece of me is still a piece of you?</p><p>vietnamese translation (do NOT repost): https://bapsworldblog.wordpress.com/2020/05/05/transficchangki-whole-lotta/</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Im Changkyun | I.M/Yoo Kihyun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>changki song inspired one shots [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1682287</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Whole Lotta</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i hope this isn't too confusing aaa enjoy</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Staring out his bay window, he watched as the Uber left his driveway and drove off into the foggy and flooded streets with the other male in it, the last of his stuff included. God he fucking hated goodbyes and this one was the worst of them all.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Feeling his heart begin to hurt as he realized he wouldn’t be able to talk to the other anymore. It felt like he had been kicked out instead of the situation being the other way around. Doubt began to settle as he began to wonder if they had made the wrong decision. What if he had said something else, something that was better; something he had always wanted to say? Turning away from the window, a tear was quickly caught by his sleeve.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>xx</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>A couple years had passed now, he still thought of the other sometimes, along with everything that came with him. He was finally settling into his new apartment, the brand new furniture he had bought was finally all moved in and arranged the way he wanted it. His new place was warm, cozy, and almost completely impersonal, kind of like a showroom. It was unsettling, but in a good way. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He had spent the last two years traveling the world, going wherever he felt like without needing permission from anyone. But, in that process of going out and trying to find out who he is and what he wants from life, there were a lot more goodbyes. He had lost some good friends, shit happened and good things ended. Even if he missed them dearly, he wouldn’t call it a waste of time. He knew that couldn’t change the past but he could learn from it and shape his future.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>These days he was beginning to truly feel himself, he was so close to finding out who exactly he is, and well that’s a form of healing in his mind. A part of healing meant letting go too, so when everyone decided it was their time to leave, he accepted it and wished them well. Nothing but positivity and good vibes. He knew it was good to say goodbye and as long as he made it out alive, he’d be alright.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And he was, he was starting to do better than alright. Even if his trips were sometimes stressful or didn’t quite work out, he always made it out alive. Pain into peaches after all. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Walking into his new office and sitting down at his desk, he grabbed his notebook followed by the first pen he could get his hands on. Clicking the pen, he opened his notebook to a random, untouched page. Unsure of what exactly he had wanted to say, he tapped the pen against the page a couple times as he rested his head against his closed fist.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was always like this, whenever he needed words they’d never come. After sitting for awhile, drawing meaningless circles on top of the paper, he finally dozed off to the sound of the thunderstorm outside. Jolting awake to a clap of thunder, he somehow had the words in his head as if they came to him in his dream. Ripping out the page he had drawn all over, he started anew.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hey, it’s me… even though we don’t talk, and I put your shit into the back of an Uber just so I wouldn’t see you after you kicked me out of your heart by saying I never meant that much to you, I somehow knew not to believe you then but didn’t realize until now…</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No, that makes it seem like I hate him… new page.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I still gotta whole lotta love for you, don’t you think a piece of me is still a piece of you…?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Good but not to start… maybe a good end. Next page.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hey… I know you probably don’t wanna hear from me, or maybe you’ve forgotten me completely, but, that day, I never got to say what I wanted to… so here’s the love letter I never wrote...</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>originally this had a set X kicks out Y but i liked it more this way  like i stated before, this was inspired by Whole Lotta by Grandson! if you don't know who he is, please check him out, he's awesome!</p><p> </p><p>i'm not entirely sure how many people are interested or something along those lines, but! i'm currently working a much, much longer changki fic that'll actually have a set update schedule! i'm hoping to post the first chapter before the end of the year! in the meantime i'll try to post a couple of things here and there!</p><p>now come yell at me or something idk<br/>twt: @whoami_mp3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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